Coach Laurel
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Clarifier: Response or reaction?

5/23/2014

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I had an inkling that I was moving forward a bit too boldly and might hurt some feelings… I was reacting rather than responding. Reacting is acting on one's initial feelings and desires where as responding is taking a moment, a breath, or perhaps longer to consider the situation and then decide how to respond.

There was a request for information on sick leave taken by employees. It was sent to Personnel. I work in a small group that provides assistance throughout the organization and had worked on this topic. Personnel sent my paper and a more recent Excel spreadsheet. After a quick review I could see that the spreadsheet did not agree with my paper. I asked myself – do I write just to the department or do I include the department and the person originally requesting information on sick leave?

It took a lot of time to work with Personnel on the original project. I was frustrated that some of our agreements regarding data analysis were apparently not adhered to when the updated Excel spreadsheet was created. I just wanted to be done with it. So I wrote an email to both the personnel department and the original requester.

Later, actually about 15 minutes later, I realized that another more fruitful approach would have been to send back a question to Personnel asking them why there is a discrepancy between their spreadsheet and the numbers in my report (which they provided). This would have opened dialogue and possibly learning.

Instead I reacted. I let my feelings from the previous project color my reaction to the current situation. If I had left the response until tomorrow I would have had time to separate the past from the present and, I believe, sent a more useful response.  I also would have caught the earlier bus…

Laurel
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    Hello, I am Coach Laurel. Please join me as I share my life from a coach's perspective. You will find I have a number of interests, love learning, and also live with a chronic illness.

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